First off, I’m finding today’s title quite creepy 😂. I’m definitely the one that put it there but sometimes mimi hujishangaa tu.

I know am not the only one that finds those matatu stickers annoyingly hilarious. I have therefore compiled a number of them, and will be sharing them here. I’ll insert my reaction in some (ended up commenting on all🥱) of them.

1. Teseka kama mama wa kambo, vumilia kama bibi ya mlevi (The hell)
2. Dawa ya deni ni kulipa, sio kubadilisha njia (Faaaxxx!!!)
3. Unasema uko mgonjwa hutaki kiti ya nyuma, ya mbele iko na daktari? (Yenyewe Huruma ni estate tu)
4. Ukiwa kwa gari unajifanya mkali na ukiwa kwa nyumba wewe ni bubu (Is there a come-back to this really?)
5. Simba na ukali wake bado anatiwa mimba (Well)
6. Unauliza kama kuna viti, kwani wengine wamekalia mitungi? (Who hurt you baaaiiiibbbyyy?!?)
7. Never argue with a fool, people may not know the difference (Show me truer words)
8. Ukitaka stage ya kumi, hamia Githurai (It’s the disrespect for me)
9. Kama uko na haraka shuka ukimbie (The bile)
10. It doesn’t matter how slowly you go, provided you don’t stop (Kazana bro)
11. Kwa matatu niite konda ama makanga lakini kwangu naitwa sweetie (and that’s on periodt!!!)
12. Hata nyanyako alikuwa manzi (My grandma was just chilling mahn!)
13. Usidharau kazi yangu maana yako hainisaidii (Truuuueee)
14. Tumia fare ujue vichochoro (Unaweza ikula pia)
15. Mimba na kitambi yote ni bidii ya mwanaume (Acha nicheke tu)

I hope to do a series of these, so send me the stickers when you come across them 😌.